Tonight’s auditions are from the hometown of last year’s winner, David Cook. Can that much awesome occur twice in one city? Stay tuned as we head toward “The Little Apple”…
After reading last night’s blog entry, My Kid said to me “Mom! Dude! I don’t like your new format! It’s lame!” Since she recently won the N.C. Young Authors Award, she knows more about writing than I do, so I will concur with her. (There’s a first time for everything, right?)
Ryan makes us wonder if the same 7,000 people who showed up six months ago for David’s hometown visit will be amongst the crowd of auditioners. (Answer: Yes.) Poor Randy seems to be lost and Kara just wants acceptance please.
My Kid’s thrilled to see dreadlocked crooner Jason Castro again, and so is Paula. He is on the scene to support his younger brother who is auditioning.
But first, we are set up to believe that gorgeous blonde Chelsea is going to be the next Carrie Underwood. Unfortunately, she is aptly described by Simon as “a cat jumping off the Empire State Building.” Girl has a nice haircut though.
Pretty Ashley sings a song by British Pop Idol Leona Lewis which was co-written by Simon. She has a good voice even though she blows the lyrics right off the bat. To prove that sometimes brownnosing pays off, she makes it through to Hollywood.
For some reason Mandy Moore has shown up to audition. Isn’t she already a star? No wait – this gal’s name is Casey and she is fabulous. Still don’t understand the “sundress with cowboy boots” fashion style but whatevs.
The next guy up has borrowed one of Simon’s tee shirts to go with his leather jacket. Brian is studying opera and really needs to stick with that. He mutilates “Think” to the amusement of the judges who sing back-up. We don’t think (think!) that he is going to make it to the next round.
Ryan gets a visit with David’s mom and step-dad who just happen to be walking by. This segues into more shots of Cookie at his most awesome.
We are subjected to some bad but hilarious guys until Von shows up. He has a dorky hat and sings “Over the Rainbow” loud enough to wake the dead. My Hubby thinks that he is great. We have to wait for a commercial break to find out that Von made it through.
Flashbacks to last year’s 4th place runner up, Jason Castro. They remind us that his little brother Michael is there to audition, and he is just as inarticulate (yet adorable) as Jason. My Kid thinks he is a major babe; evidently teen girls like bright pink hair on boys. As Simon says, Michael is “goodish” and he makes it to the next round.
After making us nauseous with a dork in a bright yellow and orange suit, we then meet bar singer/welder Matt and his family. He’s like a combination of Chris Daughtry and Sundance Head. Simon pretends to understand how important family is to a normal person, then they let Matt sing “Ain’t No Sunshine.” He has a fantastic voice and everyone but Randy agrees.
Poor little Jazz does not stand a chance as she tortures the rainbow song. Wasn’t this just yelled at us earlier? (I really need to find out where she got that skull fedora.)
Hopefully the next contestant, Jessica from the town of Oz, will be better. We have high hopes since they show her in her home taking care of her adorable grandmother. Bespectacled Jessica sings a Janis Joplin song brilliantly and makes it through.
Rapping sisters Asia and India dedicate a song to Randy, which he pretends to like. Next, they sing separately; one is horrid and the other is good. The judges now have to play Solomon - India makes it but not Asia, but they’re all okay with that.
Bartender Jamar does some more of that yelling-singing that seems very musical theater. Although they think he’s over-the-top, the judges send the Kewpie doll to Hollywood.
Jamar’s best friend Danny is up next but before he sings, he tells us tonight’s sob story. His wife Sophia passed away only four weeks ago and he’s there for her. Music teacher Danny is emotional but sings the grapevine song wonderfully. He does “Howie Mandel knuckle pushes” when he learns he’s moving to the next round.
A few really bad female contestants are shown, and then we see UNC student Anoop. He totally looks like he’s from the IT department where I work (or Kumar from House) but he surprises us with “crazy vocals.” In spite of his “Silicon Valley” look, 'Noop-Dog makes it through.
The obligatory massacre of a classic hit song is next; tonight’s is the Wonder/Frampton ditty “Signed Sealed Delivered.” They say “I’m yours” but we don’t want any of them.
We are reminded that often contestants show up in crazy costumes or have some gimmick to help them stand out. (Some of these might actually be hallucinations from my sinus meds.)
That being said, two cheerleaders come out to do an introduction for contestant Andrew. They are like the “from hell” version of Bring it On. Andrew sings “My Girl” with way too many runs but comes this-close to making it. (Weird how they thought he was too theatrical even though they let Von and Jamar through earlier.)
Next up is band director Asa, with his adorable four-year-old daughter. We hope he is good because he seems so nice. Even the judges are dismayed when he chooses a Michael Jackson song to perform. Asa defends his song choice, does it pretty well, and makes it to Hollywood.
Poor yellow-haired Michael shows his medals to Ryan. Expect to hear complaints from the Special Olympics folks after they see this audition, as it was the most uncomfortable since Bush Baby and Friend.
To lighten things up, we are treated to back-flipping Dennis, who says he had a dream about Simon (but not in a bad way.) He does “With You” almost as well as Archie did last season, but he’s way off his rocker. Dennis makes heavy with the pity and gets through to the next round.
Orange-haired Mia keeps falling asleep in the waiting room before going before the judges. She makes Minnie Ripperton roll in her grave with her YIKES rendition of “Loving You.” Mia does not take defeat well and threatens that God is going to be very mad now!
The last contestant tonight is tornado survivor and mother of three, Lil Rounds. She blows us all away with a Stevie Wonder song. Lil has the uniqueness of Fantasia and the sweet demeanor of Melinda Doolittle and is my very favorite so far. Even Simon seems to get choked up for about a split second.
They tease us with footage of upcoming audition cities and highlights from Hollywood week. It looks like the dreaded group songs are back.
Tonight’s Best Quotes:
Simon: “James, you’re like a singing Ryan Seacrest aren’t you?”
Contestant Jessica’s grandma: “These are my crazy pills.”
Paula (to Lil Rounds): “Whoever told you to stop dreaming your dreams, go tell them to kiss your ‘lil’ behind.”
Next Tuesday we’ll see auditions from San Francisco. ‘Til then, stay warm!
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