Hollywood Week – “One Last Chance”

I’ve been on a diet this week so I will start this recap with a food analogy. I know, I know - but bear with me.

American Idol has always been like a five-course meal. The initial audition cities are the soup with Hollywood week the appetizer. The roll out of the top 24 (or 36) is the salad, and the main course begins when the top 12 is finalized. The grand finale with announcement of the winner is the dessert. Throw in Idol Gives Back as a palate cleanser and we have everything we need to feel satiated. And probably ready for a nap. But I digress… BECAUSE! It’s Idol time.

Ryan, who is in disguise as Mr. Rogers, welcomes us to Day 4 of Hollywood Week. We’ve been through eight audition cities with 103,000 screaming contestants. We’ve endured the drama of Group Song Day with the requisite meltdowns. We have been blessed with THREE “singers” that we love-to-loathe. I don’t have to tell you who they are, but only two remain in the competition as of now.

The 72 remaining contestants will each get another chance to sing for the judges. They will be accompanied by a band, joined by back-up singers, and they may play an instrument if they prefer. They draw numbers to determine order of appearance. After performing they will be placed in one of the infamous Four Rooms to await their fate.

Up first is Adam Lambert, who seems more and more like David Cook’s Wicked twin. Not sure why I get that vibe; maybe it’s the guyliner? He says that he wants to twist overdone songs and make them his own (insert evil laugh here.) So Adam takes the song “Believe” by Cher and converts it into a melodramatic ballad, then adds some screamo sound effects to polish it off. Oh dear Lord. I don’t know whether to be amused or terrified. Terrimused maybe? No matter, My Kid still thinks he’s awesome.

We are flashbacked to Dueling Piano Man Matt Giraud’s first audition to see why he reminded Simon of season 5’s fabulous Elliott Yamin. Tonight he sings “Georgia on My Mind” while playing the keyboard. He is very good at the singing and the playing, a real pro. My Hubby and I like Matt a lot, so he’s got the middle-age crowd locked in.

Jamar Rogers is a retro-80s delight in kelly green and hot pink. All he needs now is an alligator emblem on his sweater. He changes “Hey There Delilah” to an R&B song, as opposed to an annoying pop one, and he sounds okay. Unfortunately he has more runs than my little dog did after she accidentally ate a cough drop.

The other half of the BFF duo – bespectacled Danny Gokey – is a much more interesting singer. His voice reminds me of Robert Downey Jr., when he sang “River” on the TV show Ally McBeal. Danny looks a bit like Robert also, and now I want him to say into the microphone “I am Iron Man.” Instead he sings a song that is the anthem of graduations every year, “I Hope You Dance.” He does an amazing job and I can’t speak because I’m choked up now. I quadruple-heart this guy and can already envision the posters in the audience: “Go Gokey!”

A few more of our early favorites are featured. We see Anoop Desai from UNC (it’s “My Prerogative” to say Boo Tarheels!) and San Juan’s favorite son Jorge Nunez. Blind pianist Scott MacIntyre tickles keys while doing Daughtry’s “Home.” He does well but is no Chris. Singing the “exit song” from season 6: bad idea or genius? Hmmm.

Finally, it’s a gal’s turn before the judges. Kendall Beard is a pretty blonde from Texas who auditioned in Puerto Rico. She has an infectious personality and does all right on the Carrie Underwood song about car vandalism.

A pattern seems to be forming tonight with the “Best of American Idols Past.” For some reason it bothers the snot out of me when the current crop of contestants perform a song made famous by a former contestant. It’s my issue and I’m dealing with it, but it still gives me the skeevies.

One of my favorite teen girls, Stevie Wright does that oh-so-catchy-rhymy Colbie Caillat song. I really like her and predict top 12 at least. Stevie is a cute gal but someone needs to get her a volumizing conditioner stat. Where is that Glam Squad they told us about on Day 1 of H’wood?

Another fave of mine is next, the fantastic Lil Rounds who sings Alicia Keys. Lil’s look has become more stylish since her first audition; she has that “it factor” that makes her stand out from the rest. She seems like a class act too, and I look forward to seeing her make top 4 at least. (My Kid and Hubby tell me to stop trying to make predictions because I will jinx everyone. Heh.)

Less impressive is two-toned park-a-Caddy-in-my-mouth Kristen McNamara. Something about her reminds me of season 4’s Jessica Sierra, pre train wreck. Last week’s drama with Nate and Nancy is still fresh on the mind. Plus she does the Kelly Clarkson song “Because of You” and didn’t we learn anything from Lisa Tucker a couple of years ago? Do these contestants even watch this show? C’mon!

A girl named Mishavonna Henson is next, to which we all say WHO? I search the memory bank and do not have any knowledge of her. Apparently she made it to Hollywood last year, blah yadda blah. She wasn’t humiliated enough so she is now back for more. At least she knows how to play the game. Cute girl from the little we have seen, but I smell smoke from cannon fodder.

It’s room shifting time… We see a room that contains Adam, Anoop and Scott, so it must be a Yes Room. But we won’t know for sure until later. The judges sort and stack and hem and haw and another group goes into a second room.

Tatiana (hahahahahaha) Del Toro is as irritating as ever. My Kid says that she’s like the ADHD version of Katharine McPhee. I disagree because I actually liked Kat. Tatiana, not so much. We get a recap of the hundred songs that she has sung since she sashayed into the San Francisco audition. Her voice is decent, not great, especially on the hallowed Whitney. Poor Tat is obviously being kept around as a ratings stunt.

All too briefly we see cute mom Alexis Grace, who has some pink in her hair now. You go Alexis! She is simply adorable even though she sings the way overdone “Before He Cheats” song.

We also get a glimpse of a guy named Kenny, who is cute and makes My Kid squee a little bit. Not sure where they’ve been hiding this boy.

Jasmine Murray nails the Jordin Sparks song “Tattoo.” She is another one that I like a lot so far, not just for her talent but she has a good attitude.

Drama Queen Nathaniel Marshall plays guitar and does an acoustic version of a Rihanna song. He sounds pretty good but facial piercings make my eyes burn.

Evidently the lecture that Simon gave earlier during H’wood Week has been dismissed. “Forget the words and you’re out!” Oops. There goes Joanna Pacitti who “ain’t got” the lyrics down pat and Casey Carlson is nasty on “Tattoo.”

A prickly Stephen Fowler mangles David Cook’s “Time of My Life.” Yep, it’s definitely the ghosts of Idols Past in the Kodak Theater tonight.

Pain in the Rear #2 is Norman, or Nick Mitchell. I don’t give too fast craps what his name is because he makes me mad. He would be fine on the other Simon Cowell-produced show America’s Got Talent, but not for MY show. For the love of all that’s holy, why is he still here? Oh yeah, ratings stunt. He draws in the Jackass crowd. I can’t take anymore of him so I go get a low-carb snack.

I am getting nervous because one of my other fave gals, Ann Marie Boskovich is in the same room as Nick/Norman. She was uncertain of singing the Lee Ann Womack song because apparently several others sang that one as well. Stupid limited song selection strikes again for the thousandth time. Ann Marie does pretty well with “I Hope You Dance” but not as good as Danny.

We are re-introduced to Juno’t Joyner, another season 7 contender who is back for another beating this year. My Kid says that she thought Juno was a pregnant teenager but Ryan explains that this is a guy with a silent ‘t on the end. This Juno’t does have an adorable kid though, but he was not adopted by Jennifer Garner. At any rate, he turns the Plain White T’s song into a soulful ballad and it’s fine.

Meanwhile, back in the psycho ward, Tatiana is getting yanked around from one room to the other. The Idiots In Charge have no mercy sometimes. Please get this chick on The Hills or The City or anywhere but here.

Needless to say, the folks in the same room as Nick/Norman and Tatiana have mentally checked out already. Their bags are already packed, even if only in their heads. Even Ryan thinks so.

A youngster named Kaylan Loyd gets her feelings hurt by Simon for no apparent reason. Her singing was not that bad. Maybe he was just tired of hearing that Alicia song? Anyway, she pouts and stomps for awhile and we don’t have high hopes for her.

At least we get to see a decent performance by Leneshe Young, the former homeless gal who sang her original song “Natty” during her initial audition. I also liked her version of “I’m Not Going to Write You a Love Song.”

Kai Kalama has LOST it but not in a good Sayid Jarrah way. His voice has given out on him and he can barely sing for the judges. He does his best while strumming guitar.

Michael Sarver, who we also know as Jeremy, performs what sounds like a country tune. He has the hard-working family man vibe that hopefully will draw votes once the competition gets to the “meat” stage.

Many hours pass… the judges have been through piles of photos and index cards and whiteboards and videos. The 72 singers (well, 70 singers and 2 irritants) have been separated into the Four Rooms. Which one(s) will be the Room of Doom?

Simon has to catch a plane so he leaves. (*cough*coward*cough*) Paula, Randy and Kara are left to tell both the good and bad news to the Four Rooms. At least Paula can mesmerize everyone with her big necklace made of sheet metal.

The first room has the following: Alexis, Joanna, Casey, Arianna, and Jasmine. After a psych out moment (unfortunately minus Shawn and Gus) they learn they have made it through to the next round.

Everyone in the next room is feeling low because they can hear the shouts of glee from the previous room. They know they are going home and they do. We will not be seeing anymore of these: Leneshe, India, Kaylan, and Jason Castro’s brother Michael.

The next room is a shoo-in with some of the best ones. Anoop, Scott, Danny, Lil, Matt, Adam and a few others. I’d bet real money that they are going to make it and they do. Gimme my money.

Those of us who have watched this show since the beginning know to always expect the unexpected. So the unexpected becomes the norm, right? Right. In the last room, there is much nerve-wracking and nail biting. Matt Breitzke, the tough-looking welder, even raises his hand and says “So it’s a no right?” Tatiana is so hysterical that someone is going to hit her upside the head with a guitar soon. (Please!) Finally mercifully, they are told that they have made it through also. Yay for Ann Marie!

It looks like the judges picked the Top 50 tonight. The good news is at least we got to hear some pretty good singing, even if it was a night of Seasons 1 – 7 Redux.

Because I take this cheesefest way more seriously than I should, I am annoyed right now. The judges seem to be talking out of both sides of their mouths with the whole “don’t forget the words” rule. We saw meltdowns of the Brooke White variety and they MADE IT in spite of the faux pas.

Also it’s aggravating to know that the Terrible Two are in the Top 50. There are at least a dozen other singers who deserved it more than those kept only as a joke. My Hubby says that we’ve not seen the last of them because that’s who everyone is talking about. (And blogging about.) Ouch!

Understatement of the Evening:
Randy: “The performances have been so sporadic.”

H’wood Week Trends:
Singing songs from former Idols – I counted 5.
Fashion - Long dresses and bare feet. (Rose Flack influence?)
Lyric flubbing. It must not be a no-no anymore.

Tomorrow night is the roll out of Season 8’s Top 36. Because I am fickle my favorite right now is Danny Gokey. Where’s that poster board? We’re making a sign!

Hollywood Week – “Forget the Words, You’re OUT”

view from the Kodak Theater

Voiceover Ryan refers to Hollywood Week as Hell Week. Guess what else is hell? A condition called vasovagal syncope. You don’t have to google; it’s just a fancy word for fainting. As in embarrassingly passing out cold while in the doctor’s office after a routine procedure. Welcome to my own personal hell week… BUT… enough about me because -

THIS. Is American Idol. Group Song Day. “I think I’ve got the vapors.”

I fast forward through the hundred years of UPCOMINGS because guess what: in just a few short minutes we will get to see the ACTUAL events. Do the constant previews of the same crap over and over help them sell more Fords and Cokes?

OF COURSE the most annoying folks will be highlighted with a bright yellow magic marker. Grating Tatiana will most definitely be the Idol contestant featured on The Soup this week because the girl is a psycho. For real.

Maddening person number next is Nathaniel. Two words: Flame Ing. After five minutes it is just annoying. Dude will need to keep that melodrama on the DL if he wants votes from the mainstream in a couple of weeks.

We’ve talked enough about Bikini Girl already. She’s been pimped enough to get the next lead on The Bachelorette. Or at least a shot at Bret Michaels’ Rock of Love.

Important commercial: This Friday is Wear Red Day according to the American Heart Association. You can save a life!

So many cat fights with not enough nip to go around. Nathaniel is having a nervous breakdown because of his group members. The red-haired black girl (Nancy Wilson, no not the one in Heart) and the two-toned blonde (Kristen) are not getting along. They are ready to beat each other to death with shovels.

Some groups are actually playing well together because they have taken the team building courses and attended the Zig Ziglar seminars. They even have all the plaques from Successories to prove their devotion to each other.

In the meantime we see scenes that could have been from the defunct soap Passions. There are some supernaturally charged moments going on with a few of these people. Someone needs to get the holy water; it’s exorcism time.

Back to Tatiana-ville. They need to do a remake of the classic Hitchcock movie and cast her as “Norma” Bates. Even one of her back-and-forth group mates says it, and to ensure we understand what she’s saying they do a closed caption. “Help me. That girl is a psycho!”

Poor pierced-face boy Nate is directing his own episode of COPS without the police officers. He’s dealing with a two-toned spoiled brat and a stone cold beyotch and finally flips his headbanded wig.

Meanwhile, it seems Katrina is MIA and her team mates are at wit’s end. They call themselves The Divas which is totally appropriate. They are so much better off without her and the drama she is packing.

Now it’s morning and finally! We might actually hear some singing. What a concept. I see one of my early favorites, Stevie Wright being interviewed at breakfast. Pierced-Face Boy is this year’s Syesha with his dramatic cue cards for the camera.

I so sincerely want Rose to get some shoes because she’s just nasty. Even the band leader is getting annoyed at these kids. I think it might be the most disjointed 104 people we have seen make it to Hollywood.

Bikini Girl does not show up for roll call and that tardy is going on her permanent record. When she finally does come slinking in, her team mates are highly pee oh’d.

Simon gives a pep talk, if one’s idea of that is kicking puppies while punching babies in the face. Everyone is more nervous than ever now as they want them to be.

The first group number is “I Want You Back” and it’s surprisingly good. There is scatting and rapping and a good rapport between the singers. Excellent enough to rewind and rewatch as a matter of fact. All of its members deservedly make it through – India, Justin, Kris and Matt.

The next group try to “Get Ready” but it’s a mess of tangled limbs and mangled lyrics. For absolutely NO apparent reason at all, Norman the Clown, the biggest season 8 pain so far makes the cut. Puerto Rican Jorge (that’s Horhay not George, KARA) makes it also. Beauty queen Julissa is out.

I love Fleetwood Mac, even through the hard times when they allowed their song “Don’t Stop” to be pimped out to politicians. It hurts my head to see two of our favorites help tear this song apart. Rocker Emily, My Kid’s favorite nerd Alex, and my fave gal Ann Marie are in this group. Alex and Ann Marie make it to the next round somehow.

The tattooed gal flubs her words and as Simon says, she’s outta there. Emily is the one who ditched her all-girl rock band to go to Hollywood. Oops.

A fedora’d guy named Ryan informs us that he’s seen the evil side of Paula. Where ya been man? They show Paula with red glowing eyes and My Kid says “I think they Photo Shopped that.” Or could she be the next demon that the Winchester brothers hunt down on Supernatural?

Simon is Mr. Cranky Panties in a Wad. He acts like Ryan Lavery’s thong has crawled up his butt. He did not fall off the turnip truck yesterday; this is the eighth season after all. He knows (as do we all) what a hot holy mess Hollywood Week will be. And what a scatter-brain Paula can be, so why argue with her?

Best Friends Forever Danny and Jamar (heart sigh) are in the same group and of course they are awesome. Their group does “Somebody to Love” and Danny holds his own with a Freddie solo. The buds as well as tall Taylor and some redshirt make it through.

Jeremy (or does he go by Michael?), Adam from Wicked, Matt the welder, and a cute gal named Jesse sing “Some Kind of Wonderful.” They are in two different groups but spliced together as if they’re one. It’s good on the level of the well-loved 80s movie with the same name. We have to rewind this one twice because it is just that terrific. They make it through because sometimes this show flows right. My Kid is loving her some Adam Lambert right now.

I feel excited to be a fan again. Wow. Yay.

But then...the Divas are a mockery of everything American Idol stands for and then some. Only Jasmine, who shines like a superstar already brings anything to the Kodak Theater stage. They massacre the cool song “Mercy” and it’s sad. My dogs are crying. Thank goodness Jasmine makes it through despite the terribleness of her group mates. Pitiful Rose, Bikini Girl (who is now known as Scoliosis Girl) and some random chick we don’t know get the axe.

A few of the singers that I liked have been voted off the island: gorgeous David Osmond, high school prez Austin, and cool smoky-voiced Deanna Brown. The Group Song tribe has spoken.

Out of the 104 people who divided into groups of four, five maximum means that the judges saw around 20 something groups on this day. We only get to see the Baby Mama Drama Obama Llama Ding-Dong-Dama ones though. Where’s blind Scott? Nerd from UNC? Little Alexis? Mandy Moore clone? Joanna Carly 2.0? Grandparent Girl? Nashville Star guy? Natty Lenesha? Horror Movie Cody?

Oh well. What we get instead is more Tatiana, who is Brenna, Mikalah, Antonella and all other previous AI divas rolled into one, shaken but not stirred. The good(ish) news is that she has a decent singing voice, it’s just that everything else about her is awful. She proves this when her group makes it through to the next round by auditioning for the next telenovela.

The next group we see is called Compromise and what an appropriate name for them. Gay Nate, Two-Toned Kristen, and Nancy (not of Heart) Wilson mangle the Duffy song right to a pathetic death. Somewhere an angel’s wings fell off. For some reason the judges think that Nathaniel and Kristen were fabulous but they let the dyed red head leave. She is NOT taking this well and there are bleep-bleeps galore. Way to burn bridges girlfrien’.

Also cut during hell week in a do-not-blink montage: Frankie Jordan (I think), dancing nekkid girl, a stubborn chick who looks like Amy Lee, and the unknown smooching couple.

Quick flashes of others who do advance... as My Kid shouts “KOOKS! They are playing The Kooks on American Idol!” ... Casey with a hat, blind Scott, tatted mom Megan, A&M Joanna, teen Arianna, that spastic rock chick Jackie, Junot from last year, and caretaker Kai.

Only 75 contestants remain but this year’s magic number is 36. There are a few spoiler web sites out there in cyberspace that reveal the 36 names. I won’t link to it here because I don’t want to know this intel yet. It’s annoying, like the UPCOMINGS. It’s like opening Christmas presents and then putting them back under the tree wrapped again.

Next week we’ll find out if our favorites made it to the winning room. We are getting to know and like: Wicked’s Adam, nerd Alex, pretty Ann Marie, UNC’s Anoop, widower Danny, teenager Jasmine, and the fabulous Lil Rounds.

We should expect the unexpected next week with the promotion of this year’s Sanjaya Times Two, Tatiana and Norman. They get on my last ever begotten nerve, I swear. Which means the thorns in my side will remain just to piss me off.

Tonight’s Quotes:

Ryan (about the group White Chocolate): “All of the contestants are cheering now but on the inside they’re saying ‘Damn, I wish we were that good.’”

Simon: “Has anyone got any Advil? We’re going to need a crate.”

Simon: “Forget this PC rubbish. Name names.”

Kara (after Katrina is canned): “She must be ready for her close-up.”

My Kid: “No wonder they named a hurricane after that girl.”

Tune in next week to Aunt Pearl’s place and we’ll vent again. Hot diggity!

Hollywood Week – “You’ve Got One Shot”

inside the Kodak Theater

To quote Buffy Summers: “I’m way off my game. My game’s left the country. It’s in Cuernavaca.”

Because I’ve had pneumonia, the past nine days have passed as if in a fog. Somehow I watched and recapped three audition episodes last week, but I don’t really remember them now.

Now that I think about it, was this because of my illness or because there wasn’t really anything that memorable going on? Something to think about…

Hopefully, I will remain conscious for the entire episode tonight. After all, it’s Episode 1 of HOLLYWOOD WEEK! Very Serious Ryan reminds us that everyone is extremely tense right now. The contestants, the judges, the producers, and mostly the viewers…

The first thing the singers do when they get to Hollywood is go to “American Idol Boot Camp” which is led by voice coach Debra Byrd. They also spend time with stylists and the Glam Squad.

Also, Barry Manilow shows up to give them a pep talk. As if these under 30-year-olds know who he is, right. Perhaps they remember him from when he coached the Top 11 of Season 5.

The group of 147 is divided in half; one set will perform for the judges the first day while the others go sightseeing. On day two, they will switch places.

Keeping with first day tradition, the contestants will come to the stage in groups of eight. Some of them will be sent home right away and others will go to the next round.

The first one we see is the wonderful Lil Rounds who does the Whitney version of the song that Dolly does better. She’s a bit shouty but we will “always love” her because she’s awesome.

Backflipping Dennis, who was a complete waste of a golden ticket in the first place, does not fare as well. Simon can’t get past his facial expressions and the guy just can’t sing good enough for this show.

Lil and a couple of others that apparently are not worthy of any footage make it to the next round. Dennis does not and he is one unhappy camper! He rants and raves and even makes fun of Simon’s clothes. Quicker than you can say Sore Loser, he is outta there.

Ryan talks to Paula and Kara about what they’ve seen so far and they are still bragging about Lil. The scenes are edited to make it look like there are contestants nearby who can hear what they are saying. A closer look reveals that they are NOT and it’s this type of editing manipulation that ticks me off about reality shows. But I digress…

A lip-pierced little guy named Nathaniel sings a song that the judges have never heard of because it’s by a Christian singer named Ray Boltz. The song is NOT about a boat, SIMON! This show, man. Anywho, the little boy falls to pieces and now all we can hear is the violins. Does Hollywood rob these kids of all dignity?

Two favorites from the audition cities, Anoop and Jasmine do very well and make it through. Anoop is from NC so that alone is enough to root for him. Jasmine is unique and gorgeous and has that “it” factor that the judges talk about all the time.

Poor little Rose Flack, the orphan gal who has a retro hippie look, is not doing well in H’wood so far. She’s missing her parents and my heart breaks for her. Fortunately, she does well enough to advance to the next day at least.

A handsome curly haired guy named Stephen is next. He is a hottie and has a smooth voice and does a Stevie Wonder song very well. As Randy said, “You slayed it dude, whaaaat??” We also see Jorge from Puerto Rico again and he and his yellow scarf do okay.

The guy who shouted the rainbow song at us, Von Smith, proves that he can not shake himself of his theatrical tendencies. Simon accuses him of being indulgent but when it comes down to a vote, Von as well as Stephen and Jorge make it through.

Debra Byrd has a “come to Jesus” meeting with the contestants in regards to the importance of song choice. It’s in the Bible, you know. In spite of the coaching, we see way too many folks get sent home because of their poor choice of song.

Norman, the clownish guy from New York, is back with his ridiculous shiny shirt and shenanigans. If this were a comedy competition, I’d laugh. This guy gets on my very last nerve and will continue to do so until they send him home.

Very quick flashes because they are wasting time on ridiculous crap like the clown, we see that Scott MacIntyre and Frankie Jordan make it to the next round. Norman makes it as well. Gee, I missed the memo about hell freezing over.

Day two of Hollywood… we are serenaded by Michael Buble and “Feeling Good.”

We are reintroduced to Jackie, the husky-voiced musician who has been in the biz for years. She sounds like Amanda from last year but has the adorable clumsiness of Kat McPhee. I like her better now.

Best friends Jamar and Danny are both in the Day 2 group. We are reminded of Danny’s widowhood and Jamar’s support. They both sing well, especially Danny with the Seal song from Batman Forever. We’re delighted that each of them make it to the next round.

That stuck-up Bikini Girl is back. Ugh. I want to throw a stiletto at the TV when she disses Kara. Way to bite the hand that feeds ya, skank. Her actual name is Katrina but who cares? She sings a few bars of “Breathe” and it’s not awful, but the judges are split. Paula and Kara think that she has a ‘tude, but of course the male judges are thinking with a different body part. Since they always have to give us someone to loathe, it might as well be this gal.

Which makes the next news all the more irritating: three gals with actual TALENT are sent home - Jessica from Oz, Sharon with the little dog, and the gal who did well in Puerto Rico, Patricia.

Jeremy and Jesus are profiled next and they’re compared to each other, kind of like when you are choosing a cell phone online and can put your options side-by-side. Jeremy (or is his name Michael?) sings great and makes it through. Hey-suse, who got through on a pity vote in the first place, is annoying and nasally and is sent home.

Good-looking David sings exactly the way you expect from an Osmond. He’s already spectacular and doesn’t need this AI gig.

Heavily tattooed rocker Emily sings a No Doubt song and it’s okay. The judges are not impressed with her and were expecting more. Both she and David make it to the next round.

A blonde gal named Erika is cut but before she leaves, she has a tirade for a thousand years. This tantrum answers my earlier question about H’wood stripping dignity away from some of these kids.

Simon and Paula argue like an old married couple trying to decide on Red Lobster or Cracker Barrel for dinner. Such lameness really makes me question my sanity for enjoying this show so much.

For reasons known only to The Idiots In Charge, they’ve decided to show only blink-and-miss-it flashes of our front runners. More time for footage of crap I suppose. Thankfully, we learn that awesome Ann Marie, Adam from Wicked, Brent from Nashville Star, and cute mom Alexis all make it through.

By the end of the second day in H’wood, we are down to 104 contestants. Tomorrow night we will see what happened during the very much dreaded group performances. Didn’t they do away with this section of the program last season?

Quote of the Evening:

Dennis: “Y'all suck as judges.”

More Hollywood action tomorrow… be sure to bring ear plugs, Tylenol and Kleenex. And the other stiletto to throw at Bikini Girl.