Let’s pop some Orville because it’s still CINEMA time on Idol. Everything from Disney to Hookers to Metal was represented last night.
We learned that Paul would rather hear some blues or funky old soul, Lauren is gonna move that mountain, Stefano wants you to love him much more, Scotty will make all your dreams come true, Casey is a very strange enchanted boy, Haley wants to come off of her color chart, Jacob will sail on silver girl, James has fifty thousand watts of power.
As the judges drag each other to the stage, we notice a sign in the audience for Steven Tyler “Most Beautiful Man.” Heh. My Kid Tru says no, that would be Johnny Depp. Or Dean Winchester on Supernatural.
We must say goodbye to someone tonight. 53 million votes says Ryan. It’s doesn’t really lessen the blow Seacrest, but thanks for trying.
Tonight’s guests are Kelly Clarkson who’s here with a country star named Jason Aldean. Rihanna will also be performing, and we hope Naima is watching her “personal idol” tonight.
Our idolettes will be performing in duets and groups again. First up, Scotty and Lauren do Lady Antebellum. I like that one song by them about it being a “quarter after one and I’m a little drunk.” We can’t let the teenagers do that one though, so they do “American Honey.” And OMG, can you say ADORBS!!?? These two are breaking my heart in a good way with how sweet and cute they are. They sing well together, they just need to watch the gestures lest they accidently poke their partner in the eyeball.
Ryan reminds us that we can download the contestants’ songs from iTunes. I have been listening to the ones from last night, and my favorite is the “Heavy Metal” song that James did. Second fave is Casey’s jazzy old Nat King Cole tune “Nature Boy.” Haley’s rendition of “Call Me” is much better than her live performance.
Next we get to see a Behind the Scenes Making of the Ford Video. They’re going all Walking Dead by doing a vid with zombies this week. James, Stef, Haley, and Scotty get to play the zombies. James especially seems to be having a blast.
The finalized music video is set to the singers doing "Animals," and the plot is that the zombies aren’t after the humans that are picnicking and playing Frisbee. They want the Ford! (This would have been way cooler if they had done the Natalia Kills song "Zombie" instead.)
So the producers must have been reading the rumor rags online regarding Casey and Haley. They are paired on a jazzy tune called “Moaning.” I’ve never heard this song before, but both of these kids are totally in their element with it. Haley especially impresses with her vocal tonight; it’s her best performance ever. Together Casey and Haley have that “geeky guy meets hot girl” vibe. Ryan is so amazed that he wants to hear what the judges think. They are going out of their mind with how good they were, mainly Haley. Tru and I agree it was one of the best female vocals on the show since Kelly.
After that performance, it would be sad to see Haley go home tonight. It’s finally time for some results action. Ryan calls Casey, Haley, Scotty, and Lauren back to the stage. We are reminded of Casey’s risk-taking that paid off. Haley’s inner Debbie Harry that didn’t really fly. Lauren and her incredibly huge earrings had a good climb. Scotty was “yo yo yo a star is born.” He is the first one safe, then Lauren. (Scotty’s dad looks like Patrick Warburton.) Casey is safe but Haley is bottom three. I don’t think the gossip about them is true; I didn’t see a boyfriend/girlfriend vibe when he hugged her.
Should have known that Rob Reiner was in the audience last night for a reason. He was with the contestants this week to talk to them about movies. The “esteemed director” and Idol fan talked to the kids about the importance of songs in films and how they can become iconic. They laugh at his take on Chariots of Fire. Rob reminds us that JHud and Carrie have both transitioned to movies, then disses the Justin/Kelly flick. Lauren can’t shake her accent, and Casey won’t live down the Seth Rogen comparisons. Jack Black who? Rob says.
The girl who started it all… Kelly Clarkson is back on the Idol stage, this time with Jason Aldean. We have no idea what he looks like because his 100 gallon hat is swallowing his head. Watching these two makes me think that maybe we’re seeing Lauren and Scotty of the Future. The country song is called “Don’t You Wanna Stay” and it’s awesome. Will be downloading that from legalsounds.com before this performance is even over, and a few more Kelly songs while there. After the performance, there is hilarious (for us) Ryan banter with Kelly. They seem like good friends but he seems to be freaking out a bit about going off script.
For our next group performance, songs from The Graduate are done by the revised Idol band - Jacob, Paul, Stefano, and James. Paul and James play guitar and they don’t start out too badly. Then the harmonies go to places that they aren’t supposed to go, and my puppy is looking at me like it’s my fault. “Mrs. Robinson” would not be pleased with these boys singing about her in this manner. “Jesus may love them more than they will know” though. Still not as bad as the Idol band a few weeks ago.
Shifting gears for more results time. Jacob let the bridge marinate over troubled waters. Paul had some crazy wild abandon. James got rock horns and could be at Ozfest. Stefano is now Steffy the Song-pire Slayer. Durbs is safe and there is an adorable nephew in the audience with a sign for Uncle James. Stefano is bottom three. Jacob gets the safety of the couch and Paul is bottom three. They are still roommates for life though!
Before we get to Rihanna, Ryan chats with living legends Chaka Khan and Anita Baker. I wish they could come mentor the kids; that would be great. Now Rihanna does her new song called “California King Bed,” and the stage is decorated with giant sheets so it all goes together. She is pretty and a good singer, with crazy dyed red hair. My favorite song of hers is the one she does with Maroon 5. Tru says the guy on guitar is hot. After the song is over and the sheets are taken down, she chats with Ryan about her tour and a duet with (ugh) Britney Spears. I am “California wishing on these stars” that I never hear that one.
Finally… who is going home? Ryan reminds us that only girls have left since the top 13. Will Haley break the trend? To our delight and Jennifer’s, she is safe. Since the semis, Stefano has been in the bottom 3 a thousand times. But Paul is the one going home. There are a lot of bleeps going on; am curious what is being censored.
Paul’s montage reminds us of his gorgeous face and “cool dude in a loose mood” demeanor. He says that it has been a fun ride. He has paid his dues and has the Rose Garden suits to prove it. His incredible smile really does light up the place. Then David Cook sings “when you walk away” and it’s over.
Jen wants Paul to sing “Maggie May” and he says not to be sad about his exit. He has a really good band to get back to.
Quotes:
Steven: Thank you for whipping that out on us.
Rob Reiner: I like being the oldest and the baldest person in the room; it’s a big ego boost for me.
Kelly: You keep rephrasing my tweets!
Ryan: We’re going to turn this into a daytime chat show right now.
I haven’t been thrilled with anything Paul's done on the show since he sang with Kendra in Vegas. But Paul fan or not, take a listen to the Grand Magnolias on their website. He is 1000 times better there than he’s been on this show. ‘Til next week, when it’s Songs from the 21st Century, or as Tru says “when music started to suck.” She cracks me up.
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