Now That it’s All Over

MY LISTS by Aunt Pearl

Most Memorable Moments
… Somewhat in order of occurrence …

Paula and Randy vote Crazy Dave into Hollywood just to tick off Simon.

“Arrogant military guy” dances with Paula, to the amusement of his wife.

“Foster home gal” disses her kids.

“I quit my job to come to this audition” gal encourages Simon to make a phone call.

Simon walks out over “Blonde Cousin Itt” argument.

Paris jokes about Ryan having a Ho’wood star but not Simon. Heh.

“I don’t do groups” and “My spirit is broken” quotes courtesy of the Devil Beard Twins.

Brenna acts like a skank ho and is chosen over the other gal who’s better.

The Devil Beard Twins are in jail for fraud.

A Brokenote Mountain parody starring the littlest cowboy.

Katharine kisses all 3 judges in a suckup yuckfest.

Simon apologizes to magnificent Mandisa.

Chris gets stuck in the elevator.

The O’Donadue twins Maxim photos instigate a scandal.

The “muzzle” dialogue (re: Brenna) between Paula and Simon is funnnny.

The Will Makar “shirt untuck” skirmish? Not so much.

My Kid and I pronounce Chris Daughtry to be the hottest guy in the universe!

Mandisa’s “dogjaw” joke is Ryan's most comical moment.

Paula switches seats with Randy after Simon ticks her off.

Ace shows off his precious little beanies, awwwww.

Simon says, “Shut up Pauler, you annoy me. It’s like being with some precocious child.”

Paris says Kevin is Chicken Little.

“One had pizza, the other had salad” and Paula had too many meds!

Kellie's “whut? a mink?” goes down in AI history.

Paula’s cup of praise overflows and then her red cup spills.

Barmaid GGW beats Basketball Girl for Top 12 spot.

Chicken Little edges out the Boondocks boy for Top 12 spot.

Kellie has “tarantulas on” but they’re not real.

Bucky has Jessica Simpson hair.

Melissa flubs her lyrics again and again…

The Chris “Live” controversy is a yawner.

Kellie’s “whut's a ballsy?” makes eyes roll everywhere.

Everyone sucks on Songs from the 21st Century theme night.

Star Search’s Lisa proves why it’s not a good idea to perform a big hit from a prior winner.

Ace shows his “permanent scar” to Paula's delight.

Mandisa’s Shackles “lifestyle” comment causes queer quivers.

Simon recants positive comments made to Katharine for the Christina Anguskankyho song, when she lands in the Bottom 2.

Is Katharine a freaky Scientologist? Have the aliens landed?

Ryan’s manly stubble is just so darn weird.

Simon quips, “Ryan, with all due respect, I’m not the one trying to look like someone out of Desperate Housewives.”

Shania proves to be bad luck for too-good-for-this-mess-anyway-Mandisa.

Kellie and Paris go all S&M for Queen night.

Taylor will never live down his “crazy little thing called” Microphone Stand Shenanigans.

Ryan tells Ace that it’s okay to wear pink.

Bucky and twin Rocky's “switching places” scandal is revealed.

Saturday Night Live parodies Taylor.

Was Ace voted off due to the Highlander hairdo?

Paula shows way too much boobies.

Kat’s “someone to watch over me” moment is Aunt Pearl’s fave vocal of the season.

Bocelli and Foster play good cop/jackass cop.

Katharine's yellow dress has an “oopsy” malfunction.

Elliott’s “song for you” makes Paula and me and a zillion others cry.

TIIC mess around with Taylor’s love song choice and fan outrage ensues.

Simon retracts his negative comments to Kat when she ends up in the Top 2. (hmmm this seems to be déjà vu in reverse…)

Yamin goes the “ducklin to swan” route and it is so freakin’ awesome!

Kellie’s outage causes me to lose a cell phone bet with My Kid.

Paris’s backpack mic comes undone and Ryan does the tag along.

Taylor drops to the floor by the end of “funky white boy.”

Katharine sings the entire “Black Horse” on her knees.

The role of Priscilla Presley is now being played by Morticia Adams.

“Pepper Dennis” asks Taylor for a “Jailhouse Rock” reprise.

Chris gets the boot - is fan complacency to blame? (or maybe it was the boxer briefs TMI?)

The band Fuel offers Chris a job as their lead singer.

Clive proves that he can’t choose good songs to save his very old life.

However, the judges rock when it comes to song choices for the contestants.

Paula gets to dance like Courtney Cox.

“You’ll know my name is Elliott Yamin!”

Katharine does great on “rainbow” again … and again.

The Gray Charles “tenderness” moment pre-grants Taylor the AI crown.

Cal-e-forn-yay doesn’t show a lot of love for their local Valley Kat.

“My Destiny” is the worst coronation song in the history of the world.

My brain will explode if I have to hear that Daniel Powter song ever again.

The premiere of the Puck –n– Pickler show is a hoot.

Katharine flees Meat Loaf.

Elliott’s sweet mom introduces her boy.

Taylor refuses Toni’s advances.

“I’m Every Woman Between the Ages of 16 and 29.”

Clay Aiken shows up disguised as kd lang.

Wow, it's PRINCE!!!

Hasselhoff cries when Taylor wins.

It’s Soul Patrol forever and ever amen!

The Best of the Worst (some of these even made it to Ho’wood!)

Sweaty Armpit Guy
Devil Beard Twins
The “I Shot the Sherriff 50 Times” Cop
Fake Suntan Girl
Ukrainian Pole Dancer
The “Gump” Inventors
Is-it-a-guy-or-is-it-a-girl?? (whatever, it’s pissed)
Wiccan Lingerie Gal
Fantasia’s Cousin
White Michael Jackson Wannabe
Filthier and Fouler than Lil Kim
The Incredible Hulk’s “Wife”
Fake Jamaican Guy
Satan With a Mullet
“Lucy Liu” Twins
Modeling School Paula Fan
Pretty Christmas Carol Diva
“My Plane Almost Crashed” Gal (from Chapel Hill)
“Fit Model” Poser
Stuck-on-Myself Ladies’ Man
The Randy Jackson Clone
The “I am a cross between Diana and Carrie” Girl
The Male Cher
“I just might be the next Clay Aiken” Boy
The Nanny Lookalike (who kept switching groups)

These folks should have had a chance to make it farther than they did…

The Barrettsmith Sisters
The Torch Singer Guy
Guy with the Good Highlights
Dental Office Rocker Gal
Crystal (the gal that Kat was arguing about)
Funeral Director Guy
Pigtail Gal with Rocker Dad
Gondolier Guy
The Old Folks Home Singer “Phoebe”

'Til January 2007...