An interesting tidbit from the “interwebs” - the Top 12 guys and girls performances this week were NOT live. Both shows were recorded “live on tape” which means that a lot of the banter we saw was staged. Bummer. Next week is when the “live and yes we mean live for real” shows begin.
We are live tonight though, with two hours to fill, whew. Quick montage of the season thus far with the new panel of judges and their “discoveries.” 40 million votes were cast over the last two nights.
Ryan’s new nickname has swept the nation already if the "Peaches" signs in the audience are any indication. He tells us that 7 out of the 12 guys and 7 out of the 12 girls will be eliminated tonight. I am not good at math, but I think that leaves 10 total contestants. There will also be a Wild Card round later this evening.
My Kid Tru and I sit with Kaylee the SuperPup, anxiously awaiting the fate of our favorites. After much debate, we almost agree on who we hope will make it to the next round: Guys – Casey, Paul, James, Scotty, Stefano (me), Jacob (her). Girls – Lauren T, Lauren A, Naima, Pia, Kendra (me), Rachel (her). Actually, to heck with all of them except Casey. As long as he makes it, we’ll be happy!
It takes approximately one hundred thousand years to introduce the top 24 contestants. One by one, they are called to the stage. You can tell who the crowd likes by the yelling.
Randy is sporting a white tee from the Simon Cowell V-neck collection, as he explains the Wild Card process. Jen has her third hairdo, which stands to reason since it’s the third night of the show this week. Tru says, "Is she wearing shrubbery?" In spite of all the ruffled fuchsia, Steven looks tired and kinda bored with the whole thing. We hope he hangs in there because he’s been one of our favorite changes on the show this year.
Recap of what we’ve seen so far this week. The stage was really colorful and we had screamers Clint (not good) and James (crazy good.) A ballad by Jovany, some R&B by Jordan. The Doors by Brett’s hair. Paul kicking out some Rod Stewart. Robbie is an Angel, but Tim not so much. Stefano is amazing, Scotty's sly. Jacob channels Luther. Casey is practicing the coronation song.
As Ryan quizzes the guys, Tru remarks that there's not as much drama this season because they got rid of most of the "sob story" people already. So true! Am glad they did that. There's not a Tatiana in this bunch.
We see the blooper reel, plus interviews that seem like blooper reels also. We learn more about the guys and it’s all good stuff. Stefano is more adorable than ever. Casey is so deadpan. We’ve come to really like most of these guys a lot!
They dim the lights to red - “it’s like the lighting at Satan’s house” Tru says. First up to the stage are Scotty and Robbie, two teen boys who are as different as night and day. Both are humble and articulate for the most part. The judges talk to the boys for such a long time that they’ve both graduated from college by now. We finally learn that Scotty has made top 10 and Robbie has not. There is still an opportunity for Wild Card though.
The next three up are Clint, Jordan, and Jovany. Or as Tru says "you suck and you suck and you suck. Good-bye." But she wishes Jovany would take his shirt off in despair. She is really cracking me up tonight! Clint and Jordan, the divos are not in top 10. Wow and neither is Jovany. That Ryan is tricky!
Now a recap of the ladies from last night. As with the boys, there are a couple of these that I am not into, so this will be interesting. We had diva-lite Ashthon, jazzy Kendra and cool Naima. Tru still wonders how many chickens were killed in the making of Thia's dress. We recall both awesome Laurens. Miss Universe Karen. Haley falling out of her mini dress. Rachel being a "bad bad girl" but not as "only girl in the world" Ta-Ty. Julie breaks away from the contest. Pia wanting to know why we look so sad.
Ryan asks the girls are they friends? Ashthon says yes they pray together and she seems sincere. They keep calling this girl a diva and she does have sass, but there is something likable about her. We see a video of the girls' photo shoots and interviews from every angle, some of them not so flattering. We notice that Julie and Pia look like sisters. Their interviews are not as entertaining as the guys.
Now to the stage come Lauren Alaina and Pia. Ryan tells Lauren that Kelly Clarkson tweeted that she reminded her of Kellie Pickler. Ewwww, Tru and I say. No matter, Lauren A. is in the top 10. She goes to hug Scotty. Sneaky Ryan tells Pia that she is also in the top 10. We are glad about these two.
Next are Ta-Ty and Julie, both gorgeous and tall and thin and leggy. For one hundred years, they are reminded of how good/bad they were last night. I think both of them were terrible. Hopefully the voters remembered how great Julie did during Hollywood and Vegas week instead. Unfortunately, neither of these girls make it through. They still have a shot at Wild Card.
More girls come to the stage… Kendra, Ashthon and Karen. I voted for Kendra last night mainly based on her duet with Paul during Vegas week. Ashthon sang that horrid song so she's doubtful. We are reminded again that Karen is bilingual. Latina for the win! We get it already. Ashthon and Kendra are sent to the stools and Karen is top 10. Bummer. Score for the Pageant Bot Team.
Finally more boys – Casey, Tim and Jacob. We like all three of these but only two did well last night. Casey is our hero this season. They beat up on Tim for not doing Jason Mraz or someone like that. Jacob makes it to top 10 and thankfully doesn’t go running through the auditorium. But he does get a hug from Karen. Casey (!!!) is also top 10 but not Tim.
Lined up next are Thia, Naima and Lauren T. The first two are dressed so colorfully that they are clashing on stage. Everyone is still puzzled by the MJ comparison of Thia Bot. One of these will be top 10 - it won’t be Naima or Lauren. It's the Thia-1000 for the win this time. Not even fair unless you are on Team Pageant Bot.
As Tru and I groan about this selection, Ryan calls Brett and Paul to the stage. Both of these guys are incredible in their own way. Brett is in a "trance right now," can’t you understand that!? The women in the audience go wild for Paul because they like, have eyes. Paul and his wild jacket make it to top 10. The camera pans to Steven who doesn’t look happy. Maybe he needs a Coke.
As we wait out the commercials, Tru mentions that this show is like a freaking heart attack. I ask her why she's worried; our favorite, Casey, has made it in already. She says she doesn’t like to see people sad. (Except Clint.)
Next up are Haley and Rachel. Neither of them got good reviews from Randy last night. Of these two, Haley did better but she is one of those singers that is going to fray my nerves. I can already tell. She's like McGhee and Scarnato rolled into one. Yep Haley makes it, the final girl in top 10.
It’s between James and Stefano and this one seems to be a no brainer. I mean Judas Priest, come on. Tru explains for the millionth time that James' eyebrow twitch is caused by his Tourettes. We will be seeing more of it; James makes it and Stefano is sent to the other chair to await Wild Card fate.
The top 10 has been named. Randy thinks it’s a great top ten, America. America says "you're welcome."
Ryan explains that we are doing Wild Card now. It’s second chance time for six contestants. Three boys and three girls. They can do any song from the competition so far, read: a song that the band has rehearsed with them.
First up to sing is Ashthon. Tru is disappointed, as Ashthon is not her favorite singer. I like her personality but she sings that "I Am Telling You" song that's been done to death. This would be a good choice if she could sing but it’s shouty and off-key at the end. The judges like her performance and attitude. As Tru says it’s not a personality contest.
The first guy up to "sing for his life" is Stefano. He sings a slow song called "I Need You Now." His voice is perfect but he makes funny faces. He reminds me of Ferris Bueller, and now all I can hear is Ben Stein's voice. Tru says he reminds her of Phil of the Future but I don’t know what that means. The judges are over the moon for his performance, and Steven even woke up for a few minutes.
Kendra is chosen by Steven to come back for Wild Card. She sings "Georgia on My Mind," and she sounds a bit shaky at first but brings it all the way home by the end. She has incredible range and the audience goes wild. She can out sing about half the girls already sitting in the top 10.
We see Jovany next and he pulls the bilingual trick of mixing English and Spanish with his Wild Card song. His voice is nice and clear and Jen loves him. Ryan is rushing things along now because the clock is ticking.
Naima is chosen next to sing and we say a final goodbye to the others. Of these I will miss Lauren Turner. Tru says Rachel will do great on Broadway. Naima is doing “For All We Know” and the lyrics are very poignant. She is the best of the three Wild Card girls because her entire heart is in this performance. Then she cries and Ryan tells her to just breathe. (He has a show to do.)
We ponder again why Steven seems so glum, and Tru says maybe he just doesn’t like the eliminations. Good point. The last Wild Card is Robbie. We say goodbye again to the others. Tru will miss Brett and is broken- hearted. Robbie sings the "Sorry" song and pleads "what have I got to do to make you love me?" Tru realizes that almost all the Wild Card songs are about "making you love me." He does a good job but the song seems to go on forever. Tru mentions that when you sing a sad song with a smile it comes across as sarcastic. Good call.
Clock-watching Ryan quickly brings the six back to the stage and then… we have a break. So much tension! The judges still aren’t ready and it’s LIVE TV. What will we do? Why, we will watch Jen’s brand new music video, of course. Contrived much? Some guy named Pitbull who looks like Bruce Willis is also in the video. The song is called "On the Floor" and it's one of those auto-tuned to death pop dance ditties with lots of half naked people dancing. The only compliment I can offer is that Jennifer is gorgeous. The song is horrible enough to make Paula Abdul’s “Dance Like There’s No Tomorrow” a classic by comparison.
And now back to the real reason we are here. The six still on the stage. Another break? You have got to be kidding. Tru says that the remaining six are probably standing there thinking they can all sing better than J.Lo, natch. And I thought I was jaded!
The first Wild Card chosen is Ashthon. Tru is very ticked at this choice. Stefano makes it also and that almost makes up for it. James is glad to see him and greets him at the winning circle with big hugs. The final pick is Naima; we are thrilled about this as she goes running to Jacob.
Quotes:
James: It’s like, why would I be in "Country Living?"
Lauren A: I don’t know, I’m just Lauren.
Ryan: An international sex symbol calling you sexy? How do you feel? Casey: I feel sexy.
Ryan corrals the Top 13 to the stage and quickly tells us that next week they will be turned into “true recording artists.” He pulls the show off just in time. Good job Peaches! And I promise to never call you that again.
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