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Saturday, March 3, 2007

2 out of 4 Ain’t Bad


March 1, 2007

For many reasons, I am very tardy on posting the results-night blog. I usually can not WAIT to vent my feelings. There is much life-stuff going on with work and church and whatnot. But the main reason, I have’ta admit – I am bored with a capital B.O.R.E.D with the show this season and have been uninspired to blog. Never ever thought that I would admit that…

As a borderline obsessive compulsive narcissist, I analyze the reasons why this could be possible. So let me count the ways…

1) There is no sexy-hot guy in a Daughtry way. No Flowing Locks of Ace. No Soul Patrol Soul Patrol! No Amish Elf (heart sigh, I miss Elliott the most.) Melinda and LaKisha fill the Mandisa void, so methinks I will be rooting for a lady this year.

2) Every other song that we have heard since this season began has been a repeat of something that a previous contestant has done better. My Kid and My Hubby tell me that I should just let this go and not let it aggravate me so much. Not even sure why it irks me so. Maybe because it makes the show feel like a re-run. And the only show that I can bear to watch in re-runs is My Name is Earl.

3) Ryan and The Judges are soooo predictable. ‘Nuff said about that.

4) Way too many of the Top 24 were not introduced until the very last mili-second of being chosen for the semi-finals. TIIC made a mistake not showing at least a snippet of these folks. The contestants are not on a level playing field when they do not get equal airtime.

5) Many eliminated contestants that we saw in the early eps were a zillion times better than most of the current Top 24. This year seems way too cookie-cutter. Hence the boredom of me.

6) So in other words - status quo!!

But I digress …

We watch the recaps of everyone – the good, the bad and the awesome. Then it is group sing time. “Jeremiah was a bullfrog!” I have never understood this darn song. The kids do okay with it and yep there it is – The Prerequisite Pointy Pose, y’all. Gotta have it.

Now it’s time to boot a dude. Ryan asks the back row of guys to stand. Phil, Sligh, Sundance, and Blake are the no-brainers and are told right off the bat that they are safe. Jared is asked to come stand with Ryan… tick tock tick tock… it was a fake-out cuz Jared is safe!

Then just-like-that, it’s no votes for Pedro. Nick is the first one going home. He reminds us that he has very cute dimples and a decent voice. I go get a nutty-buddy while he sings “Fever.”

Now it’s time to send Overbite Girl home, please for the love of GOD!! The obvious are told first that they are safe – Stephanie, Gina, Sabrina, and Melinda. Buh bye to Alaina who can always play in the next Charlie’s Angels movie. She is pretty enough. But she can’t sing that Dixie Chicks song and she doesn’t even try. It is sad and painful to watch. It seems like EVERYONE is crying. What the heck does TIIC DO to these kids behind the scenes???

Filler fodder with the stupid trivia question. Bored now.

Mae West comes out on stage to talk to Ryan. No wait. It’s Kellie Pickler. Wow, she is busting out of her dress, pardon the pun. Even Ryan is taking notice, snap! I tell My Hubby that now is a good time to take the dogs out, but his eyes are glued to the TV, mesmerized by the Pickler bosoms. Kellie sings a song that she co-wrote and I get over the irritation of her nasality long enough to realize that she is singing about her mom who abandoned her. Awwww it is sad and I am moved. And then it is finally mercifully over.

So now that we are all choked up… ‘bye to a guy time. Chris R. and Brandon are safe. You can tell that Brandon was worried. Sanjaya and AJ are left standing. Well, this is a no-brainer. The ‘tweens are all agog over itty bitty San, no matter that his voice is weak. He has not done well since his first audition which rocked. And yep, he will get another chance. AJ is out, much to San’s surprise. He does the girly omigod routine.

Awesome moment when Paula stands up and says, “This is a SINGING competition, yet I don’t feel tonight reflects that.” Uh, do whut Bubba? Since when has it been about singing?? Okay, moving on.

I actually stick around for AJ’s sing out, which he does very well. Just noticed that he is probably the tiniest human that has ever been on this show. Both guys and gals are still bawling.

NOW, we are going to lose Antonella. Please? Pretty please?? And no, it’s not the naughty photos that make me want her off this FAMILY show. As Paula just said, this is a SINGING competion, people. Not Playmate of the year. And she is the poorest singer in the competition.

So obviously LaKisha is safe, that was a gimme. Haley is safe, which is surprising. Coming to the front now are Overbite, Leslie, and Jordin. Yes, JORDIN. I can not freakin’ BELIEVE it. An-toilet-a (google her name if you don’t understand that nickname) is declared safe and teen-age boys and Vote for the Worst aficionados all over America are jumping for joy.

I have honestly never seen so many sobbing contestants. We need some Prozac, stat! Finally, Ryan tells Leslie that she is the one going home. She sings that very same song that AJ just sang. It’s a good song too, and they both did well. Leslie gives the angry edge to hers though, which is appropriate.

The “I’m going Home, to the place that I belong” videos are shown for the ousted four. Neither AJ nor Leslie deserved to go home tonight. What a rip off! At least Leslie got a dig in with the “America doesn’t like jazz” quip. Maybe she should have played the lupus card for some pity votes? Nah, she took the high road.

Oh well… we are stuck with two of the most insipid contestants in American Idol history. Next week’s eliminations will determine the Top 12. And ha! We thought it couldn’t get worse than Covais and McGhee.

Pardon the hysterical laughter…

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